The Future’s Shite – The Future’s Orange (*updated again*)

“Hello Orange, can you sell me a Micro-SIM for a Pay-as-you-go iPhone 4, please?”  “Certainly sir, that’ll be ten pounds, and it will be with you in four to five days.”

Piece of piss.  Or so you’d think …

You just try getting one.  Try getting through to the bastards, first.  SIX (count ’em) times I tried yesterday morning.  Twice I got cut off after negotiating an automated system from hell.  Twice I was told that all advisors were busy, and the mix of naff music and bowl-clenchingly awful voice-over woman was enough to make me quite nauseous.  One the one occasion I did get through to someone, they gave me an alternative number to try.  Which was my sixth attempt.  That failed too.  Completely the wrong department.

“I know”, I thought, proverbial 60w bulb glowing dimly above my head – “I’ll call the Orange shop in Cardiff.  They’ll have one for me when I go in.”  I still don’t know whether they do or not.  Nobody answered the phone, other than the automated voice telling me that all sales advisors were busy.  Busy flirting or admiring their product-spiked hair in the window, I’m guessing.

In true British fashion, I gave up.  I knew that if I phoned the Apple Store in Cardiff, they’d probably tell me whether Orange would sell me one or not.  I’m told that, unlike most stores of that ‘ilk’, three salespersons don’t accost/molest you as soon as you walk in.  They’re polite and ask you how you are.  And for the most part they leave you alone – unless you look completely lost or are about to make off for something without paying.  I’m looking forward to my Apple Cardiff experience very much.  I’m told they have lots of music keyboards and software and Macs running, and you can make phone calls and use FaceTime from iPhone to iPhone, all of which sounds very neat.

I do feel, though, that it might be a case of “have phone, won’t be able to use it.”  Not for a little while at least.


FINALLY got through to someone who spoke sense (and English).  Five minutes on the phone to a jolly chap from the North West got me a Micro SIM I’ve been after for over a week.  2-4 days in the post.  3G PAYG Micro-SIM.  Nice.  Thanks, Orange.  Amazing what you can achieve when you get the right number & department.

UPDATE 29/9/2011

This years’ gripe with Orange is over their 3G dongle.  I’ve got a basic cheapskates one.  I pay about £13 a month for this, which I use rarely.  Now, it seems, it doesn’t work with OSX Lion.  So I’m still paying for the use of it when I’m unable to use it.

So I phoned them.

“Not our problem” implied the rude girl on the end of the phone.  This came after she told me it was a problem with the compatibility with the new Thunderbolt technology Apple had introduced.  I said there was no possible way Thunderbolt would interfere with a 3G dongle, and in any case, my MacBook Pro doesn’t have Thunderbolt anyway.  She sighed, very loudly, before disappearing off to ask someone.

When she came back, she announced that it’s Apple’s problem, and that “they’re working on it” and “it shouldn’t be too long”, before pretty-much ushering me off the phone.



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